Parents Need to Lead by Example

Rob Naddelman: Through a Parent’s Eyes

The start of baseball season is only a few weeks away. This is an exciting time in the lives of high school baseball families. The start of a new season brings a lot of hope and aspiration for a strong performance, and for juniors and seniors in particular, a leg up in the college recruiting process.

At Baseball Factory, the start of the high school season also causes some interesting discussion to percolate between our staff and parents across the country. When we speak to parents and ask how they view the outlook for the season, we are often on the receiving end of a lot of negativity concerning team politics, how unfair the coach is, how the teachers hurt their son’s chances to be eligible, and so on.

While I certainly understand that challenging situations present themselves every day in each person’s life, and high school baseball is no different, how you react to those situations is often how you are judged. Young men often feed off the energy and perspective of their parents and how you as parents react can be a mirror for your children to emulate. So make the commitment to be a good example for your son to follow as it relates to your part in high school baseball. Here are some quick tips to help get you on the right path and frame of mind.

1. Stay away from blaming politics. The truth is that politics exist everywhere in life. Instead of complaining about them, use it as motivation. For more information on this topic visit Steve Bernhardt’s blog which has a lot of great advice.

2. Stop blaming the high school coach. Some high school coaches are more knowledgeable than others. Some are more committed. Try to take the most positive aspects of your coach's personality and skill set and focus on those. If you require additional professional help to achieve your son’s baseball goals, seek outside help from Baseball Factory or other local contacts.

3. Don’t ride the umpires. One of my biggest pet peeves is hearing parents ride the umpire for questionable calls. Just encourage the boys to play the game and do their best. Bad calls are a part of every level of play. Shake them off and don’t make excuses.

4. Stay away from the dugout during games. This is a big no-no in my mind. During games, players need to stand on their own and focus on their teammates and coaches. They don’t need to be distracted during games to seek your approval by looking to the stands or behind the dugout. Do your part and stay in the bleachers and be supportive of their efforts.

5. Be a good fan. Support all the players on the team, even if one is playing over your son. Don’t back stab other players and talk about how your son should be playing instead. Be supportive and encourage everyone. If you want to be your son's advocate, do it in a positive way that highlights his strengths.

I can guarantee that if you take a positive approach and “lead by example” your son will be sure to follow.



Rob Naddelman is the President of Baseball Factory. Naddelman is a former two-time All Ivy League Third Baseman at the University of Pennsylvania, where he competed in a College World Series Regional. He has served as the President of Baseball Factory for the past 13 years, and also is the Executive Director of Baseball Factory's charitable arm The B.A.S.E. - H.I.T. Foundation. Naddelman and Steve Sclafani (CEO) have been featured in Business Week and CNN for their work in building Baseball Factory into the nation's leader in player development and college placement.

No More Politics

Steve Bernhardt: Building the Better Ballplayer

Enough talk about politics already! No, not the Presidential Race, I mean the complaints about politics on your high school or summer league baseball team.

I know that politics exist out there. Someone made the team or is starting because of “politics.” Here’s a news flash: They will exist in everything you do for the rest of your life, so let’s learn how to handle them. Whether it involves a Minor League player being penciled into the line-up every day because of the signing bonus invested in him, a co-worker getting a promotion because he’s related to the boss or a company landing a large new client because the CEO’s play golf together every week, politics exist in all facets of life. In the long run, dealing with them properly will help build mental toughness and make us better all-around individuals.

Let’s stop using politics as an excuse and learn the ways to prevent the situation from occurring in the first place. Here are some ways to avoid being benched by politics:

1. Follow the rules – Many players and parents who have a “political situation” also have some sort of rule infringement in their past. Don’t open yourself up to a negative repercussion by breaking a rule. Get to practice on time. Listen to your coaches. Do what they ask. Do well in the classroom and have accountability for your actions on and off the field.
2. Be versatile – Have the ability to play several positions. Maybe you are better than the starting catcher whose father paid for the new scoreboard, but I think you would enjoy the season more as the starting 1B or LF than pouting on the bench in your catcher’s equipment. Give yourself options – Brandon Inge of the Detroit Tigers is a great example. In 2003 he caught 104 games for the Tigers. In the off-season, Detroit signed Ivan Rodriguez. Inge’s versatility allowed him to be the starting 3B instead of a back-up catcher. He was a major part of the Tigers’ trip to the World Series in 2006 with 27 HR and 83 RBI as their 3B.
3. Be likeable – This sounds a bit ridiculous I know, but stay with me here. Coaches are regular people; they will be biased toward people they like. If you work hard, are positive, are a good teammate and respectful of your Coach, he will probably like you. Bad body language, ill-timed comments and laziness stick in a coach’s mind for a long time.
   

You’ve followed these elementary rules, but you still think you are wrongfully on the bench. It’s time to talk to the coach. Here’s how to do it:

1. YOU (The Player) must be the one to initiate the contact and meet with your Coach. Parents are not involved at this point. The coach will listen more to you as a player and ultimately respect you more for handling the situation yourself. Also, a man-to-man talk with an authority figure is a beneficial learning experience for the future.
2. You ask the coach in a private setting (without any other players or parents around) if you can speak with him privately at some time in the near future. Set an appointment or be ready to talk on the spot if your Coach says he has time now.
3. Be non-confrontational and ask for advice. The first line should be something like “Coach, I really want to help our team win and I would like to know where I need to improve so that I can get into the line-up and contribute”. This should be plenty to get the conversation rolling. Remember to be positive, have good body language, no matter what the coach says, and stress your willingness to improve in an effort to help the team. The difference between what the Coach sees in you and what you think about your own abilities may amaze you. You should leave this conversation knowing what you need to show the coach in order to get on the field. Remember, whether you agree with the Coach or not – he writes out the line-up for every game, so you need to cater to what he is looking for in a player.
   

These political situations don’t always have happy endings, but our best chance is to handle them properly. After the ordeal is finally over, we emerge more mature and with more mental toughness. This mental toughness is a key ingredient to a successful baseball player and a successful person. It’s just one more block that helps us build a better baseball player.


Bernhardt played for five years in the Colorado Rockies organization. As Executive VP of Baseball Operations at Baseball Factory, he oversees all events and instruction. Bernhardt currently serves as an Associate Scout with the Colorado Rockies. He received his B.S. from the University of Richmond where he was an All-Conference player.